rebel. ♥♥

soooo. i havent blogged for a while.  cause nothings really happened. until two weeks ago.

rebel died. its the most horrible thing i've been through so far.

these two weeks are the only two weeks in my entire life, that i have had without her.

and i hate how we didnt really get to say goodbye. well when we took her to the hospital, i saw how hard she was trying to breathe, and how limp she was, so naturally i assumed she was going downhill. i was the last one in my family to hold her, and that means something to me. she was my dog, and i loved her as one of our family.

my whole family were devastated about this, because dad and rebel were pretty much best friends, and while he doesnt show it physically, i can tell how hard it is for him to spend the day without his best friend. chris, while he didnt show much emotion throughout this, he was the one who persistently offered to take her to the vet, or offer help in anyway he can.  im sure that bec is going to miss her sitting outside her house every morning, and just being around for her.

and i still cry everytime i think of her. i miss her so much. she was the best dog i could have ever asked for. i spend hours a day sitting at her grave just trying to grasp at the concept that shes no longer here. I have still yet to ride the quad again, because its just too hard now that shes not running with me. 

i just. i want her back. i would have done anything just for a few more days. i loved her more then my own life. 

   come back to me. ♥

r.i.p rebel.

31st Oct 

2009